e- What-the-heck?

Ok, who's trying to be funny?
I open my work inbox to find the usual library listserv emails, google alerts, stuff from co-workers, etc, when I spot a subject line that says "Meet great singles in your area!"

Huh? Is this a joke? Um....yeah. Delete.

I've never had dating emails sent to my work address before. Hotmail, yes...but not the work one. Super.

I don't even remotely feel like jumping into the singles pool again. I'm maybe, possibly ready for getting my pretty-painted toes wet, but that's about it. Sure, my male friends are encouraging me to "get back out there and find a nice rebound boy." I'm not interested.

I'm not knocking e-Harmony or those other internet matching sites. I know they can be effective, and for some people they work. I just don't feel like working too hard right now to find Mr. Right. And I really don't feel like paying money to find him.

Over the winter, I stumbled upon the book, "Be Honest - You Weren't That Into Him, Either," by Ian Kerner. One thing I really took from that was this: If I want to meet somebody truly fabulous, I have to become truly fabulous first.

In other words, how can I expect to find a totally great guy if I am not feeling great myself?

More than anything, I need time. Time to relax, time to heal, time to recollect and time to become that fabulous person again. I need time more than a rebound boy, a one-night fling, or a eHarmony email. I do think we meet people when we least expect it. I also think we meet them when we are at our best and happy with ourselves.

I know I will get to that place again, when I have that spring in my step and an easy-going smile on my face. It will come. I wouldn't expect to attract many men at this point, and that's ok. If I want to meet someone great, I have to become my "best" self.

And that is what I will do. Be the best I can be, surround myself around the best people and want the best. Work out, be generous, be kind, eat healthy, work hard and play hard.

So, eHarmony, match.com and all the other singles-schmingles websites can send me all the emails they want. I'm not taking the plunge.