First Date Rituals

Friday, 5 pm: Walk Kelly
5:15 pm: Feed Kelly, Sweep kitchen floor, Lay out clothes
5:30 pm: Paint nails, then lay down, shut eyes
6:10: Heat up some soup for dinner
6:23: Run the vacuum through the living room
6:28: Open and pour glass of white wine
6:30: Get in the shower
6:35: Shave legs (Do you have time for this?? Yes.)
6:40: Use pumice stone on feet? Nah. He won't see your feet, at least not tonight.
6:45: Plunge face in bowl of iced water, then exfoliate with real salt
6:50: Blow-dry hair
6:58: Apply make up
7:05: Get dressed, then pour second glass of wine
7:10: Curl hair, text Katie and Steph
7:20: Apply finishing touches, put shoes on, finish wine
7:23: Tidy up living room, check out outfit for the tenth time
7:25: Tell Kelly to quit barking and pacing. Oh wait, that's me.
7:26: Sit nervously on bed, watching Deal or No Deal
7:27: Do I have time for another glass of wine?
7:29: Doorbell rings